IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME!! In today’s episode, Ismatou (On Our Terms) and Sofi (Am I Too Loud?!) sat down for the conversation they've both been circling for years. The one about sex, silence, shame, and everything Black Muslim women were never supposed to say out loud.
From the sex talk that never happened to the cultural double standards that shaped how they learned about their own bodies, this episode is raw, honest, and long overdue. They're unpacking what happens when religion gets weaponized, when silence does more damage than the thing everyone's afraid to name, and what it actually takes to start unlearning all of it.
This is Part 1 of a two-part series.
00:00 Content Warning & Welcome to the Crossover
01:12 Why This Conversation Terrifies Us
10:46 When Did Sex Become Forbidden?
17:05 Boarding School, Boys & Early Experiences
28:34 The Silence vs The Shame
39:43 Virginity, Religion & What We Were Actually Taught
51:08 Blue Balls, Guilt & Sexual Coercion
58:47 Trigger Warning: FGM - Taking Away Choice
1:09:46 Control Disguised as Culture & Religion
1:16:55 Your Body, Your Choice - Closing Thoughts
Content note: This episode includes discussions of sexual assault, FGM, and trauma. Listener discretion is advised.
Follow On Our Terms: @onourtermspod
Follow Am I Too Loud?!: @amitooloudpod
Follow your hosts: @uotamsi & @the_odditty
*Tags*
Black Muslim women, sex and Islam, purity culture, Muslim women, faith and sexuality, Black women podcasts, crossover episode, Am I Too Loud, On Our Terms, FGM, sexual health, Muslim dating, shame and religion, West African culture, modesty culture, first generation, eldest daughter