Valentine's crash out, Diaspora wars, Shaboozey, IShowSpeed & 100 yrs of BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!

I need you guys to understand the level, the level of crash out that I did not put myself through. Now, you might be wondering, Sophie, what do you mean? Because if you're watching this on YouTube, on the video portion of the podcast, I might seem a bit agitated. Guys, welcome to Amai Tula, the freaking podcast with Sophie, aka the mother freaking auditing. I just recorded an hour, are you kidding me right now? No, because that is just racism. The fire alarm going off for my Black History Month episode is crazy. Welcome to Amai Tula, the podcast. I just want to point out that it's not planned. We put batteries in that thing. It should not be going off. I was so embarrassed right now. At least that just made me laugh, because as I was saying, backs me being serious. Guys, I just recorded an hour, 30 minutes, minutes, am I Russian? Of straight banger, like I'm telling you the words that I spoke in that podcast, I've never been spoken before. I was giving your heads back to back to back an hour, 30 minutes. You know what happened? You know what happened to that footage? It wasn't in focus. I am so over technology. In fact, I even try to fix it using AI, and this is why Fudge AI from now till tomorrow, because I also just paid 400 bands for an AI tool to de-blur the video, did not work, did not work, so this crash out was supposed to have happened and it didn't happen. It's the fact that honestly, I didn't crash out. Like if I feel that way, because I'm crashing out right now on camera, but when it happened, when I looked at my laptop, when I was downloading that file, and I saw what my eyes saw. I promise you, I just looked. I just took a deep breath, breathed in and out, and I started looking at options. And that's how you know I have grown so much, because Sophie, of two years ago, might have jumped out of her balcony in DC, and I'm trigger warning. And honestly, with the way things I've been going in my life lately, that might have been my 13th reason why. I'm telling you all. I don't think you understand the bangers from that episode that you're never going to hear or watch is something that like, oh, that would have been my break. That would have been my big break. I just know that that episode that I just was blurred was episode. It was going to make me make it. I'm so sure that was my, that was my big break. And the universe just said, maybe I need to hold on. Maybe it's not right now, maybe soon, because there's no other reason. There's no other reason for this. And all of you know what? You guys don't care, because you want me to get into that episode. So welcome back to my To Love the Podcast with Sophie, aka the Motherfucking Autity. Let's get into the episode. And honestly, because you guys didn't even know what happened the first time, I don't think you guys will understand how it's still going to be a blonde girl episode, because I still have a lot to say. Thankfully, I have notes. So like, we're not going to be struggling a little bit. I just know it wasn't my first. But again, what did they say about the first, I don't really know. The first isn't always the best, right? It might be the second, second time is the right time. Maybe, well, guys, yesterday was Valentine's Day. And guys, I am currently married, single, and it's a hell of complicated. So my love life is simply that I am a married, single, complicated relationship person. And what can I say, the struggle is real. This might have been the worst Valentine's Day I've ever experienced. And this has nothing to do with my partners. I think I am just in such a transitional space in my life right now that everything is a trigger for me. And it was just a really trigger, heavy day. Just thinking about it, because there's a lot of thing pieces about Valentine's Day and whether or not we like it, we love it, all that and stuff. But like, I woke up yesterday. Just first of all, the noise before Valentine's Day this year was a bit peculiar, wasn't it? The way it worked, usually like the couples are already soft to launching before Valentine's Day. You know what I'm saying? Like, usually quieter already, no. But like, 2026, I already had a lot of breakups. There was a bit, there was a lot of breakups happening already. That was giving me a bit of, you know, what's going on in love. And then comes to think about it, Valentine's Day happens. And there wasn't as much love out there. Maybe everyone is just going through it. They talk about how 2025 was the year of the snake. And I feel like we're all thinking that exact same thing. Because in Norway, I was, I was, guys, let me tell you. I was seated on the bathroom floor in a panic attack yesterday, crying my eyes out yesterday with Valentine's Day, crying my eyes out. And I can't tell you what's wrong, because I can't over share everything. Just know I will be okay. You know what I'm saying? Like I needed that cry. I feel like I kept saying I'll have hit rock bottom and I keep hitting rock bottom. Every day that something happens, I keep hitting rock bottom. And the funny thing is I'm realizing how your decision to accept something is the reason why your life might be the way it is. And I'll tell you that yesterday, right? Okay, first of all, Valentine's Day, let's get into that. Rough. And I feel like when I think about all the Valentine's days that I've had in the past, I've always been more of like, you know, I wouldn't say a showy lover girl. I don't think so, because I have had like the whole like, person surprises you, gives you the flowers and all that stuff, which was fun. And I really do, I love flowers. So I got sunflowers yesterday for Valentine's Day for my auntie. Let me talk about that real quick. So again, on the floor in the bathroom sobbing, because just having a rough day, not feeling very loved, not feeling very in love, not feeling like I love myself, I was down bad. And I am literally having a panic attack. Like I'm crying like, oh my god, I'm bawling my eyes out. Cry, guys, you know, I feel like you guys have seen me cry a little bit of my vlog channel. But I'm telling you, I am the ugliest cry, and I was crying. And I kept calling my best friend, because she kind of like knows, like she's the only person I think I've ever called when I'm that down bad. Like when I'm crying in that way, she's the only person who I know that wouldn't exactly what to say to me to get me to stop crying. But it was Valentine's Day and my best friend is married. So this poor girl is trying to balance being a great best friend to me and also being a great, you know, wife to her husband. And that in itself was a bit of a struggle because, you know, she was in the car. I'm crying. I'm like, I just, I'm dead in there. And she's like, I know how can I help with the man is looking at her like, girl, like I just want to, you know, I want to have some love time. So I felt really bad. So I got off the phone with her and then I was like, okay, you know what I'm like, you're in that cry. You're like in that moment where, because I'm not, I don't think I'm a solo cry. Like I'm going to kind of present who likes crying by myself. I don't know if that makes sense. Like I don't like crying by myself. Like I need, I need an audience. Like I need someone to see me cry because it just feels sad like crying. Like yeah, I can cry like a little bit. Like I can cry for like two minutes and then the rest of the five minutes, I need to be on the phone with someone because I will go crazy. Like someone needs to see me cry. Like it can't just be me just by myself. Because then in my head, like if you're crying by yourself, you should be done really quickly. Like I don't think you need to be crying for that long of a time. Because like if you're crying and then you're with someone on the phone, they can say something like a trigger more tears or you're trying to explain yourself to the cry intensifies. But like when you're crying alone, it's like, okay, you're feeling the emotions you cry. And then yeah, like, if you're crying more than you just intentionally hurting yourself. And I feel like mentally for me, I just know that I really shouldn't be hurting myself this much. I really should just stop crying. I don't know if that sounds crazy. So anyways, I'm crying this cry. And I'm like, who can I call? And I remember that I have an estranged uncle who has the best ex-wife Auntie who if you don't know the lore, it's it's a long story. Just know that my uncle who was like a blood relative got married to this amazing woman and she's my aunt through marriage. And I am very estranged with the uncle, but I fuck with this handy heavy. So she's like the mom of me. And you know, I'm the kind of person who I don't know if you guys are like this or your family, but I can't I really when I cry, I like to say like I want my mom because my therapist was saying my inner child just really wants someone to like feel connected to and wants to be in my mom's bosom, whatever. But my mom is like a warrior. Like my mom is the kind of person who if I call her and I tell her, hey, like I'm going through something. She's going to be like, how can I help? And like, how can I like, he's going to be okay? My mom is more of like a, I'm going to panic too. Like I can't have that. Like I can't have her calling me five times after my cry. Now she's crying and I'm crying more because she's crying. And now we're all worried. And now for the next two weeks, she's going to keep asking me if I'm okay because she's really panicking and then she doesn't also live with me. So I just know my mom is not the right person to call in the state of panic. Now my auntie though, I've called her once, I think before and she handled it perfectly. So this time I want to call her again and I am bawling. Like at this point, I'm having a whole panic attack. I don't know why I'm telling you guys a story. I'm going to continue anyways. I am bawling having this panic attack. I'm screaming. I'm crying. It's heavy. And then she just tells me, breathe in and out. I think this is what I was going with that. And I just want to say that anyone who knows, like how to calm me down in a panic, shout out to them, like shout out to my auntie for real, because the way she calm me down, okay guys, that breathing was rough because I have a cold, but God, I sound so congested. But you get the point. So she's like breathe in, breathe out. And I appreciate that because here's the thing. I love my friends, right? And I'm staying in a house with my friends. We're living together right now and it's been really fun. And I am not the most, like, I don't love physical touch. I just know my thing, right? So I realize why I don't like physical touch. And it's because I can't get past thinking about the other person. Let me tell you what I mean. So before I started the panic, I've already been crying. And I'm going upstairs to go cry in private, because I have friends with me. And they're going to worry, of course. So one of them clearly sees me crying and he's like, are you okay? Do you need a hug? Okay, let's talk about that. When someone asks you, do you need a hug? There is no wrong answer except no. I don't think I should ever, when someone says, do you need a hug? That's just them telling me they want a hug. I'm like, I did not feel bad. If I say no, then I feel bad about it. I'm a people pleaser. I'm working on it. So I'm like, yes, now he has a thing. I hate physical touch. And yes, hugs are great. But the moment we hug, I'm feeling more emotional now. Now I want to start crying some more. Now I'm conscious of the fact that I'm crying even more on you. I'm not going to get snought on your shirt. You're hugging me now. I'm hugging you back in the right way. How long is this hug going to take? If I release this hug too early, does that mean you think I hate you? If I keep holding you while you're ready to release it, now we're in the awkward spot. And this is why I hate hugs. I hate hugs so much because that awkward spot freaks me out. Like, because between the moment we start hugging and the moment whoever person chooses to let go, there's a power imbalance there. Because we don't know who's letting go. Like, do I initiate the letting go? Then that means would you hug me again? Because you might feel like I didn't really want the hug. Would you let me go? And in that case, like, was I doing too much? That's why you let me go. It's too much. That's why I say hugs. See, adapt. We're done. Easy. Easy. Even handshakes. Like, how long are we going up and down for? How long are we going? Are we going sideways? Are we going up? Are you going in for the hug? Are we holding hands? Are we rubbing the pinkies together? Like, it's too much. This is why physical touch stresses me out. Anyways, I'm upstairs and I'm still panicking. And I also, as I'm thinking about this panic attack now that I was going through a monster need to breathe in and breathe out. I'm thinking about Karatek in high-potential, which is a show I've been loving on Hulu. And Morgan was having a panic attack and he, they're like two characters in the show. And he's holding her while she's like, Karatek, no, no, leave me. And he's like, it's holding her down. And I'm like, see? I don't know if that will work for me. Because if I'm telling you to leave me alone, you hug me. Would I like that? I'm not sure. Anyways, my auntie goes ahead to calm me down. I'm finally calm after talking to her. And she's not asking me like, are you okay? Do you need to talk about it? And I hate that when I'm like crashing. I'm like, don't ask me. I'm okay. Clearly I'm not okay. I'm crashing out. She's not asking any of that. She's just like, breathe in. Out. She's like, breathe out properly and take it back in. Her voice is so calming. And then after she's like, what's your address? I'm going to send you something. And then she sends me sunflowers. And I think that's the whole point of this. It's because I was having such a bad day. And she saw that. And she chose to send me sunflowers, which is where my favorite flower. I literally have a tattoo on my hand. I don't know if you can see it. And that just showed me that if someone wanted to, they would. And it was just the intention of the act that got to me. And so when I hear I think pieces on Valentine's Day where people are like, well, I'm already married to you or you're already my girl. So like, why would I do anything special? Why wouldn't you? Why wouldn't you do anything special for someone you claim to love? That to me is crazy. I had this ex one time, honestly, that love him down. He was so great, he was so good, he was so sweet. But like, I remember I think something happened. And he started getting me flowers because I was in my flower era. And I love flowers, right? So he starts getting me flowers. And at some point I think right after we broke up or before we broke up, I find out that the flowers were on a subscription. Meaning he wasn't intentionally picking out flowers. He just did a subscription and then the flowers came. I think they were like every month or every week. I can't remember. But I remember when I found out it was subscription, everything that had happened, every flower he got from me did not match up to me anymore. Because in my head, I was just like, that was an intentional. Like, you didn't even think before like, and even like, if you forgot, maybe you didn't, maybe you had a special note each time, I don't know. But the fact that it became transactional just made me, made me not like the emotion behind it. Anyway, that's so random. I told you all that story. But that's also like something around Valentine's Day. Anyways, so Valentine's Day was yesterday. And I'm telling you that I'm learning so much about myself, especially around self love. So I think yesterday when my aunt sent me those flowers, it just kind of made me just be like, oh my god. Like, why was I sort of like sulking? And this is nothing to do with my love life at all. It was just like life itself was just happening like so dramatically yesterday. But that just made me realize how important it is for me to have intentional people around me. And I say that also because I wrote a sub-stack article this week. Your girls on sub-stack. And I think I wanted to start a sub-stack because you guys remember the era of blogs. Like, I used to be a blog girl. The blogs were like, the girlies would be doing like fashion halls and reviews and thought catalog. Like all those like deep ass write-ups. That was my jam. The Wapat era's, the medium articles. I think medium was even new. Like, this was like the SEO blog travel baddie. Like, saturation heavy, like photos, like photoshoots and blog images. Like the overlay photos. Oh, that was a time. I feel like sub-stack is like very similar to that now and people have been loving like that right up. It also makes me feel very introspective at the same time. Anyways, this week before Valentine's Day, I did an article that was titled Women Need to Learn to Eat a Restaurant Salon or something like that. Don't judge me, I forget the title. But it was something along those lines. And that came up and I write about this in the sub-stack because I have a friend who has a partner, they're married and they have a baby. And I was just telling her about my travel plans. She was telling me about she would really love to travel to the X Y and Z place and we're just yapping. I was like, oh my god, like you should definitely go to X Y and Z place. It's going to be great. And it will be so fun on the solo trip. And like that way you can de-stress and she's like solo trip. So if I could never go on the solo trip, I could never even go solo dining. Like that is not for me. I would rather go out with my man. And I was looking at her like, um, like what do you mean? And you know what, this is not even one of those. Like if it's just your choice, it's fine. I think more women need to learn how to be alone with themselves. I don't think a lot of women are comfortable with that. And it's just going to be thinking, I really realize that solo dating is such a phenomenon. It's such a new thing now for women. Because I think a lot of people think if you see a woman alone at a bar, she's single, she's asking for it. She might, I don't freaking know. Most people don't just think, oh, she's out there taking care of herself. Going on a date, having a fun time. And I think that's lacking for lack of a better word. I just don't understand why it is such an issue for people to go solo dating. Do you, if you remember this, like the saying treat yourself how you want to treat yourself, how you would want others to treat you. For me, that happens in every freaking facet of my entire life. And especially around dating, around relationships. If I already buy myself flowers, if I already buy the most expensive things for myself, if I am someone who likes a quality lifestyle, it needs to be a lifestyle that I can afford for myself. So whoever is coming to come into my life, who's going to be my partner, would understand that. Because they would know, me don't take nuts in. Okay, I don't think nothing but the best. And if you love yourself so deeply, you would fall in love with your own company. And for me, I'm telling you guys, there's such a beauty in solo dating. There's such a beauty in getting dressed, putting some makeup on. If you don't like makeup, getting some clothes on something, you're really nice, a little fit. And it's going about your date. I grew up with a single mom. My mom is not, I wouldn't say she was the most fashion-forward, girly, pop woman. My mom was very much like a business woman. Like she was top of the, she's going to the top of the chain. She's hanging with a lot of men. She's like very like, she's a boss. She's a boss in her field. One of the only women doing some of the badass things she used to do. So I attribute a success to that sort of fast-paced lifestyle. My mom is coming, she's getting ready. She never really took time for self-care. And I think when we think about self-care now, we think of something frivolous. We think of burning candles, fancy soaps, putting on a robe, red wine. You think of slow and atp's. And sometimes it doesn't feel productive. It doesn't feel like something we should be doing. It feels like maybe an indulgence or privilege. Which it is. But I think there's a sort of envy I have for the women who understood the importance of self-care really early on. And I think I never understood the importance of it until recently. I'm the girl who give me some doodles soon. Give me some love, bar soap. I'm washing everything quick. I'm out of shower. I use a towel. I put some skincare on. I'm good to go. Where's my email? What I need to shoot. What I need to host. I never took the time to take care of me. And I just... Now when I think about the girlies with the five-step beauty routine, with the body oil, shower, oil, bath, balm, this, that. I have to think, oh, what a privilege it is to have the time to do that. But I didn't realize the necessity of having the time to do that. I would always wonder how their nervous system was so regulated. But when you take the time to sit with yourself, to shower in the morning, to do the extra layer of body scrub and body oil, do the extra layer for your skincare routine. Put some nice music on. You are regulating your nervous system in such a way that it is so beautiful. When you're so accustomed to taking yourself out to experience new things, people cannot take you for idiots. Because you know what's up. Nothing is new. When you are able to solo travel to new destinations, a random person coming at you with a vacation wouldn't sound like an innovation. It would sound like just a normal Tuesday or weekend in your life. People are going to come correct because of that, because of how you treat yourself. And it's something I am constantly learning about me, and I really want you guys to take that onto you. And it doesn't have to be super expensive. It can be something as little as adding an extra layer of massaging your back before you, as you're putting lotion on, as you're putting that Vaseline on. If you're a girly like me who likes to do so, maybe it's just romancing and massaging your body while you're using the soap. Maybe doing the African net sponge thing and then having an exfoliator if you can. Doing things that take the time to cherish you is such a game changer. And I think for me, self care has been so important because I didn't have the data like that is just... It just really matters. It really does. So yeah, that's how my Valentine's Day went. And I was one of those people who was sat on the internet trying to see who was celebrating Valentine's Day, who's not. Whose couple was posting, whose couple is not. And honestly, no one did. Like, I mean, I was used to Cardi B showing up with a million roses, but I now remember like, oh shit, they broke up. So now we didn't even get Cardi B's roses. Kim Kardashian used to do the big Valentine's Day thing. You know what? As I think about all these celebrities that we watch and compare our lives to, we realize, huh? Even with all that love bombing, it doesn't really matter, does it? The thousands of flowers, if the relationship in the character is so terrible. What does that say about social media and public perception? No, I'm not playing. I'm so deadass. It really is. It's important for you to not compare your life to people you see online. It just is. I think I love when Valentine's Day comes around and I see the girl he's doing like, Valentine's and I see the couples enjoying themselves. And I see those who aren't perfect because you can always tell the performative ones. Like you can always tell the couple that like is doing and putting on a performance. And you can tell those who are genuine and maybe not. Maybe I'm just over because I don't have, I don't know these people's lives. But what I do know is I think it's so important for us the viewers who are engaging in sort of like wanting romance and wanting all these things to be very clear in what we actually want and what we love. Like I remember when my aunts sent me the sunflowers, I was just thinking, oh my god, she knew me enough to not send me roses. She sent me sunflowers. Like, how very intentional, how very loving. Even I myself when I think about them, like, oh, these are things that I know for a fact I would do for myself that she did for me too. I don't know, it was just really special. Love comes in so many different facets. I know like everybody wants that romantic love from, I think in general they want that companionship. But I think it's such a beauty when you're so in love with yourself that when romantic love does come, it just, if it's right in, it makes sense, it makes you happy, it makes you feel fulfilled. And I think Valentine's Day is such a beautiful day to express our love to your person. So also sidebar slash not really a sidebar. For someone whose partner is like, oh, I celebrate you every other time. Why don't you celebrate you Valentine's Day? Move on. Get away from that person. Get away. Run away. Because I've never heard of anything where you're telling someone, oh, this is a very special day. Let's just make it extra special. And the person is like, nah, it's already special enough, special enough. You say you love me and the one day of love. You don't want to show it's like someone who's like with a partner who doesn't celebrate their birthdays. Well, you know your partner loves birthdays and you don't go all out for their birthday. That's the idea of loving someone the way you want to be loved versus how they want to be loved. Right? A lot of people struggle with that relationships and it's very telling to see. Anyways, this episode is not about Valentine's Day. We are in the hundredth year. It is the hundredth year of celebrating Black History Month. Let's hear it for all the Black people in the world. But especially Black History Month in America. Now here's the thing. Usually whenever I come on here, I feel like my episodes are oftentimes like very specific to the things I want to talk about. And I think whenever people think of Black History, especially because I know my audience is very Nigerian and American, it's interesting that sometimes we don't want to hear it. We don't want to listen. We hear Black History Month and we're already like no things like this seems so like not fun. So this episode might not be fun for a lot of people but it is important and it is necessary. And I feel like I wanted to throw my voice in the conversation because Black History Month I think is so so so so special for so many reasons. But one of those reasons is the fact that one in ten Black people in America are immigrants. And about 4.6 million people plus are Black people in America. One in ten of them are immigrants and that's going to double by 2060. And just to give you an idea of the US population. White folks are about 56-58% and next is Hispanic with 19%. Black or African 13% and then mixed people 4% Asian 6%. So in many ways they are. What's the word for it? It is a lot of us. And in the conversation on Black History Month I think is important to talk about my journey in America and how I think maybe not frustrating it is but how interesting the world has become for so many reasons. And as I think about this I'm just going to draw back to the last episode I recorded because guys I'm telling you I was in flow state with that episode. And I'm trying to like you know what your brain is trying to think about the things you said that were so great in that episode. And I know it's weird because you guys don't know the episode I'm talking about because you didn't hear it because it was blurred. I'm still frustrated about that can you tell but I'm trying my best to not be dramatic. Yeah so flow state. Black History Month being an immigrant. So let's talk about this from the context of me. If you guys don't know I'm Nigerian and it's something I tell people all the time and I sort of move around with that arrogance of being Nigerian and Black History isn't something that was taught to me growing up. I think for many in many ways it was sort of something that we just sort of learned especially as you came into this country and as an immigrant coming into America. One thing I needed to understand and I think that I feel like I was very intentional about was understanding the people who are currently here. And I say that from the context of Shabuzie so Shabuzie won a Grammy and let me get my phone Shabuzie won a Grammy and Shabuzie in that Grammy speech which we're going to talk about here. Damn I just walked in here literally 10 seconds ago. I got a speech man I've never written a speech in my life and yesterday I said I should write a speech. And again the last thing I want to say immigrants built this country literally actually so this is for them for all children of immigrants. This is also for those who came to this country and searched a better opportunity to be a part of a nation that promised freedom for all the equal opportunities opportunity to everyone willing to work for it. Thank you for bringing your culture, your music, your stories and your traditions here. You give America color. I love y'all so much. Thank you. During that award sort of speech Shabuzie goes ahead to talk about how he um he's what is the word. He is Kama Siddhi say um he's a child of immigrants and immigrants built this country and I think the uproar that happened with him saying that I was essentially like well no black people built this country. And that's facts facts so um he goes ahead to then release a statement where he says person from most I want to express my deep gratitude to everyone who is supported and celebrated my journey as an artist. I also want to acknowledge the conversation surrounding my acceptance speech to be clear I know and believe that we black people have also built this country. My words were never intended to dismiss that truth. I am both a black man and the son of Nigerian immigrants. And in the overwhelming moment of winning my first Grammy my focus was on honoring the sacrifices my parents made by coming to this country to give me and my siblings opportunities they never had. At the same time winning this award on the first day of black history month and becoming the first black man to win best country duo in black history. It stands on the foundation laid by generations of black people who fought sacrifice and succeeded long before me this moment held all belong to all of us. My entire career has been rooted in lifting people up honoring where we come from and expanding what's possible. I'm proud to be a part of that legacy and I intend to continue doing that work for the rest of my life with love to Boise. Now here's the thing I totally understand where he was coming from in terms of saying immigrants built this country. But I think what a lot of us sometimes especially Nigerian immigrants because we sometimes suffer from what I like to call the immigrants Olympics. Let's use that word since Olympics is currently happening right now. The immigrant Olympics where where Nigerian Americans are a pretty solid ethnic group or you know ethnic group. I'm using the word ethnic group within the American climate meaning we're the best of the best right where the ones in the fancy. If you if you see some students in America and they're talking about how the student just born all these awards and is going all expenses paid to like private school staffers. Usually some two boys in go see something something or I did collab or something like it's usually a Nigerian name. Not all the time but most of the time right. So as a certain level of elitism and excellence that Nigerians and Nigerian Americans bring into the conversation that aside within the conversation of Shabuzie speech. Black immigrants they know even immigrants. They're not immigrants because immigration requires you to tell people hey I am coming into this place to migrate into this country for a reason. Even those who have to immigrate because they are running away from their home country to somewhere. A lot of those people are immigrants because they are migrating by choice to a country. Black people in America were not immigrants. They are not immigrants. They were taken. They were actually taken. They were colonization made it so that why people went to Africa. Went to these countries. There are no other countries at the time most of the time. And sod seeds of distrust war all that stuff lie to the rulers instead. We want these people took them on both. Some of those who for the nervous survive coming here. We've seen the doors of no return to then take actual people. Humans who they then turn into three fifths of a human to come to a country to work to toil to build. From the ground up the country that we are all enjoying right now. Black people made this country and now doesn't ever talk about American Indians and all of that conversation because I'm not even equipped for that. But you get the point. Like we can't argue that. You cannot argue. That is a fact. So when I hear immigrants build this country, I say immigrants thrive in this country. Immigrants succeed in this country. The American dream is a reason because of the hard work. Like I can't imagine America where Martin Luther King didn't do and I have a dream speech. I don't think the world would be the same. The America we know not wouldn't be as receptive to black immigrants like it is right now. No matter what. I think the world that we know now is possible because of the work a lot of black people in America did to grow to push for equality for them in this country. And the frustrations there is happening because that erasure is already happening. And even that grouping of black people not as Americans but as an immigrant group is also crazy because as an immigrant, like I think about it in this way. Nigerian Americans are people who have not both parents or one parent is Nigerian or Ghanaian Americans or Chinese Americans. Like your parents are, you know, the immigrant from this country they stayed here. You were born in this country. So now you're black American but your ethnicity is still Nigerian because both of your parents are Nigerian. And so in Shabuzie's case, right? He's Nigerian American because his parents are Nigerian. His name is Shabuzie. Shabuzie? Shabuzie. And so in many ways he is able to pull from a black American culture but he is not black American in the context of a black American descendant from slavery. He is, like from a lack of better word, he is in many ways not in the better word. He is in many ways a product of immigration, right? And I think that's what he was talking about by saying how hard his parents had worked. But his parents wouldn't have a place to work if black people didn't exist, didn't show up, didn't toil for the country that they are in now. So I think for me, I understand the frustration because I don't think you guys, unless you live in America or I'm telling you, I do not think the people can fully grasp how intense racism is in this country. And I just, I don't think you understood. I think unless you fully live in America for a long period of time, you can never fully understand it. And I think even separately from that, where you live also dictates how close you are to the racism that is in America. And we talk about it. I talk about it a lot when I think about when I was in college in Louisiana, which is deep in the South, and my, I was in orientation staff and I don't know how to explain this, but during that time, I had a big, who was this guy, who was a white guy, and we were so close and we went through orientation staff together, it was so great to me. And then when Trump won the election, I remember he was very vocal about going back to my country. And I remember thinking, I thought you liked me. Until this man went into office, acted as sworn. You were going to come tonight here with me because you just loved the culture. I think the current administration hasn't done a great job of bringing out the demons that has been lurking underneath within the American conversation. Now let me say this, I don't think it's surprising. And why I say that is because I always argue with people that humans are simply this. Like we are the product of what we are. So I love to say this a lot. I have a master's in peace and conflict studies. And the one thing I learned with my master is peace is not possible. Because to truly find peace, we have to sort of be at peace with ourselves. And I think that's a really big ask for a lot of people in the world. Because peace requires each human to be at peace with themselves to foster peace in the world. That is something that I don't think is ever going to be possible. Because when we think about it, humanity and history is always moved in cycles. I think stuff like the Holocaust and the ethnocentric ideals that came out of those centuries behind us all happened because intermingling happened. And folks are freaking out and saying, we don't want these people here. They need to go because one thing humans would always, always, always fear is the unknown. We hate the things we don't know. When we talk about trans people, when we talk about queer people, when we talk about a different culture or a different religion, humans oftentimes cannot stand things they do not know. And they could always learn about it. They could always be curious about it and try. But we, I don't know whether it's socialization, whether it's just how innate may there is biology, we are oftentimes not curious to find out. Because I wonder what a world would look like if we all just thought, hmm, the Superbowl, the freaking Superbowl. I wonder if, rather than saying, oh my god, I wish Bad Bunny was speaking English, we just said, oh I wish I could learn Spanish. What a beautiful way to think, isn't it? Oh, I wonder if I could speak Spanish. So that way I could understand him. And now I'm even bilingual. We love bilingual baddies. A trilingual, if you already speak multiple languages, I don't know if that's the thing. You know what I mean? What if that was the conversation? Because what's so funny is the feedback from a lot of people about Bad Bunny at the Superbowl was, oh, you know, it's unfair because Americans can't speak Spanish. So how dare him speak or perform the whole thing? And I'm like, Oh, I'm gonna start. Do you know how many songs we all sing when we don't know the words or what they mean? I mean, half of Ashake's songs are Sake that was blowing up in America. People singing your about word-for-word bar for bar. No, I've been knowing a clue about what it means, but they're singing your bar for bar. So I think we all have a little bit of fear around, you know, the things we don't know. And I say the cycle continues because you saw that happen with the Holocaust and just a general push for just ethnocentric conversations. And then there was a time where people were like, that was really horrible. We don't want that and an immigration sort. And I think we can talk about like folks who immigrate to this country on like green car lotteries or visa lotteries or citizenship lotteries. And, you know, the brain dump of different people from Asia coming into America and like vice versa, the boom of immigration to Ireland and London and the UK. And I think it's a very human thing and a society thing. So then for all these people to go, this is too much, let's go back to wanting it just for ourselves. And I think it's so funny though, because when people talk about immigrants and immigration, I always think about this podcast episode with Whitney Adebayo and her sister. And the Whitney Adebayo is a love Island UK all star. And there was the most candid conversation I've ever heard about immigration because her sister is talking about how like people from the UK are always yapping and yapping away about how they need to go back to their countries. And she was like, you guys made us come here. You took our resources. You took everything. Now we like it here. Now we want to stay and now you're mad at us. And I was like, that is such an honest reaction to immigration policies right now because a lot of immigrants, if you ask them would love, would love to be back in their home countries, would love love to be back in their home countries. But the resources in their countries is what is fueling your country. So they're just here for the piece of the pie. That's the issue. And when I think about it, all these people that talking about coming to the country comes to the country. Everybody in America is an immigrant. And Americans like British white people who ended up just saying we don't like what's happening in Britain, let's come settle down and then they took over the people who are actually American. And then now America is the land of, I don't know what they think they are about American values. And I'm thinking about it now, I'm like, y'all didn't really even like your place that you immigrated from because I mean to I don't want to live in Russia. So I think it's very unfair for why people to come and be like, oh go back to your countries because you think I want to be in the UK. You guys got some like once a year, please, no, we don't get tried. In fact, think about it, Ghana is one of the top exporters of cocoa and gold and shea butter and all these things in the region. And Switzerland and Italy and all these places are top exporters of this thing. And they take all these resources. You can think about the Congo, think about all these African countries whose natural resources are siphoned from them. And they're used to prop up these Western powers. If we said enough is enough, let us take our thing. Do you think anything would be working in America in Europe? It's so funny now when I think about the tariffs that are happening in America and how if people just deep did, the Western world can't survive without immigrants in the Western world. Because most of the things are fuel the Western world, aren't from the Western world. When I say the Western world, I honestly am just meaning America, especially because even the resources in this country aren't enough to fuel the country. We know this. That's the beauty of humanity. If we all realize that we're all sort of meant to work together. And I think it's so sad and it's so selfish that we live in a world where of course we're not doing that. And we use fear and we use greed. And it's always about money and capitalism because this all sounds like nice, doesn't it? Like what I'm saying right now just makes sense. It makes sense to me. It makes sense that you know what? Of course, my country is a shit show because of what colonization did to it. So I'm going to want to better place. I would love to be in my country, but I can't because your country and your country people took so much from my country and you're still taking. So now it needs to come to your country, you live in it. So I can make a better life for myself. And now you're mad at me. You're saying go back to my country. Can I take my resources back with me? No, well, damn. Now we're both out of sand still. Because then how's that fair to me? Because you knew what you were doing when you were taking my resources. You knew how good my country could get. But you chose not to let my country get good because you wanted to take all that goodness for yourself. And that is green. That is human nature at its peak. And so for me, I think when we talk about immigration and black history, I just I never want even as an immigrant to forget that the reason why there isn't even is an America to immigrate to is because of all the work that black Americans have done for this country. So happy a hundredth black history month. I'm thinking about black history month. It doesn't even hit the same. It's so sad too. Because I remember when George Floyd happened and there was this hoopla around the world about it. And so many brands were pouring in like you had black history month activations. You had all these things. Now. You hear that? Nothing. I don't think there was one campaign this year about black history month. I don't think there was one campaign. You see like Nike with like all black athletes set up were like some special drop. Some special drop of black history month awareness a hundred years of black history. Not one brand did something bold did something dynamic to something historical that we're having to now deal with a world where that's actually the reality where people. It's just I think for black history month is just sad now when I think about it because I was looking forward to this month especially because it's such a special month in America because you sort of feel the pride of black Americans. But there's so much around immigration and so much about like black culture and black culture losing itself that it's even becoming harder for people to talk about it. And we need to talk about it. So I understand the backlash around what Shibuzie said because there is a conversation around immigration and people mistakenly dooping black people into that conversation because again black people are not immigrants in this country. Because immigrants mean again means you chose to come into a space they were not they do not choose to be here. But all the same they've built this country to what it is now and I think we all need to respect that. And also if you're thinking about the Grammys let's talk about Tyler. And I got so many people being so upset with the fact that Tyler won the Grammy for African artists of the year African music of the year African song of the year. But I wasn't I wished she didn't win not because I don't fuck with her or anything but I wanted someone else to win. In the grand scheme of things Tyler does have the numbers. And again I think it comes it goes down to like this Nigerian idea that we're like we know when you're in your own echo chamber so you hear the same songs. Oh this is like so new. But I think either Rolling Stone or Billboard just released an article where they said Rema is a one hit wonder of the 20th century or 2026 or 25 or something like that. And they've been going in Rema a one hit wonder. Do you know who he is? How many songs he has? But one thing I got out of that conversation was to the American public to 310 million people. I don't think they would know a zebra the way Nigerians would the way Caribbean people might. Because a zebra was not calm down honestly calm down wasn't even if by the video calm down was a generational run of its time. And that sort of like that sort of push and fame that calm down got is something that would be super hard to replicate. I mean Mona Lisa, like these songs were amazing they're incredible they're so huge but again calm down Selena Gomez. That was a time that was such that was bigger than what any of us could ever imagine. So from on that perspective I don't think they're wrong because calm down was huge it was massive. And I think even Rema is set for life without going that song like he's set for life. But a lot of people are upset about it rightfully so because they're like we know Rema we know he's not a one hit wonder. But again we forget that the Grammys is an American institution and America has 310 million people maybe even more. And they some most of them would not know who Rema is. And I think this is what happens when maybe all the social media in the world is sort of controlled by one person right. Because in this scenario America sort of is what is pushing the narrative in like different countries. And that's what we all sort of look to like that world power right. So big news like the Grammys, the Hollywood, Golden Globes all these things are very much centered within around America. You know you see British actors wanting to come to America Chinese actors Korean actors all want to come here. So that is also there anyways I say all that to say Tyler's you know Tyler dominated she won the Grammy people were mad about it. But again it's America it made sense if you're an American watching that it would have made sense as she took it. Because if anything people were going to ask who his ira star who is David. Like maybe not who is David I would say that because compared to Tyler. David might still be a big superstar but just not on her level like her generational or young her generational run especially being able to that girl is in Japan. Guys Japan. She's conquered Asia Africa Australia. She is fully a global superstar like we can't knock that and even though we as African especially with Afrobeats. If that award was like Afrobeats artists of the year maybe I would have felt differently because then I would say oh maybe Tyler's a little more pop. But it says African artists I'm guessing that just means the artist is from the continent of Africa. And in that situation then Tyler is one of the biggest artists out of Africa right now. We might not like to hear it but it is fact. Anyways so let's turn to I show speed now this is something that when I tell you when I found out that speed was going to do a tour with Africa. I was a bit concerned I won't lie because first of all I know streaming but I've never fully sat down for a stream. I think the only stream I've ever fully watched and maybe you know I've been sat down for it just watching clips online was Kevin Hart with you know Druski and Kaisena which is I love Kevin Hart so fantastic. But this one I was very curious about and when I found out he was going to Nigeria again Nigeria just if it's about to do my country I want to clock in I want to see what's going on. We're not going to talk about Nigeria's stream. If you know you know I don't need to add any more to that conversation there's nothing else to say. We're just going to move on from it but I think what speed did for the African continent is something that would we wouldn't even know the impact of it for a really long time. And I say that to say that there was a lot of conversation around people saying they didn't even realize speed was that big in Africa. And then some stupid people saying they didn't even realize that you know Africans at access to phones or internet so they could stream someone like speed and be huge fans of him. And to that I say open a book. Yeah and to the other point I say valid because I think when the thing that most Americans know about Africa is simply that you know Africa is what the kid with the flies around their mouth Mr. Beast philanthropy with trying to you know build villages and give villages water. And that is a part of it you know what I mean like I'm not going to sit here and be like oh but you know Africa is very very developed and everything is great because that's not true. Maybe 40% is developed in 60% isn't and that is something that we as Africans need to wrestle with that the continent still has a lot of growth that needs to happen Nigeria one of the giants of Africa still has a lot of growth. But I think what speed did was show the really good parts the really bad parts and the in between parts and every country every continent has that to like there are places that look like third world countries in America in Asia. There are places look like third world countries all over the world not only within the continent. So I think it was so fun to see him sort of explore and there was so many pieces about whether or not he should have you know been more intentional going to visit historic sites. And I was like that was what he's just turned 21 that's a 21 year old streamer none of those kids watching that man want anything educational. They want to have fun and he did a good job of keeping the energy bubbly still teaching I remember there was something in maybe Egypt or Ethiopia around diamonds. I can't remember the country but essentially he visited and there was a museum and he was talking about can I buy a diamond they're like oh only three people. Three companies in the world can buy diamonds and I was like that seems weird why would diamonds from a country that has a lot of it only be given to three vendors for the entire world. That's suspicious that's weird that is something that would have been harder for someone to share because the government would have tried to cover it up. But if you're alive on stream you're a 20 year old boy who's just asking crazy questions curious questions and those answers are there it lets other people start questioning a lot of things. I know when he went to Algeria there was a lot of racism that happened within the northern African space and a lot of people were very shocked by that. If you're an African you're probably not if you're a black Muslim you're probably not because racism exists within the Arab space heavy okay especially North Africa. And the crazy thing is just seeing people call speed a monkey or just I saw the recent post where Barack Obama and Michelle were also called that is the stupidest thing. Do we know how stupid racism is like are we I don't think you guys understand like it is different. I'm just going around real quick it is different if there was some biological visual thing we could see that made racist better than the other. And I mean on a quivico thing that we can argue like clearly because you're white to your Superman like that level of oh yeah you're superior because you're a Superman. If we could see that I would understand racism but no you would just think you were better than everybody because I you didn't get twisted as much as I got twisted under the sun. And first of all everybody likes their toast a little bit brown some people even like a crispy. Some people like eating the food that is dark and burnt because it even tastes better sometimes. Nobody likes bland food right and I'm not saying are you know but I'm just saying most of the time it's the seasoning people we even like that's human nature for you. So to me when we when I hear or see the argument around you know racism it just I don't understand it. I don't understand it. I don't understand it. I don't understand it. I just I don't understand it. It makes no logical sense to me and it's not supposed because it's society constructs like how does society get to that point. I know it's something I should probably read up on but how does how does a society get to that point. Because at the end of the day when we all die we die the same. You're just bones just like me your bones like me were bones together our brains are the same sometimes I'm even smarter. I just don't understand it and the people who seem so vehemently sure that they are better than other humans in the world have nothing but audacity and belief because that's the only thing because I can just wake up today and say I'm better than everybody else and I can just think that I behave like that. And if I have a lot of money then that means that I am right apparently it's all about money isn't it. It's all about money and power. It is all about money and power. Who child okay so guys where was I speed yeah so it was just interesting. I really enjoyed watching this stream. I'm not going to lie again I just watched Nigeria Ghana and I think I watched Namibia. I really thought he was going to do the dunes in Namibia because I really really want to go visit that but I think he did like a village of topless women. I'm not sure I think that was the clip I saw and I was like I've seen a lot of titties in my life is fine. It might have been more than titties I'm not going to lie and this is me just being honest but I did see some titties and I was like well I don't know if this is for me. I love titties I'm just saying I don't know why I need to reiterate that. But yeah so it was really fun the Ghana stream was really nice. I will say that I felt like it was a bit unfair because his bodyguard was going to end and so I think there was some level of you know chitation going on from that point. But also I saw his South Africa stream and I think he went to Rwanda. I know he went to do the Google attract which I think is iconic and I need to do that in my lifetime. But yeah so that was really fun and again I love that he showcased the continent in a way that was raw was unapologetic was human was fun was engaging. I don't think anyone has done that I mean speed travel to Africa in a way that I don't think even Africans and travel to Africa. I don't think any African is going to be able to do that. Like the access alone that he was able to bypass and get because of his new variety is something that not a lot of Africans can do. I mean I'm thinking visas I'm thinking immigration folks wanting some bribes I'm thinking all that coordination just to travel within the continent and how he had to have handled that to make it work insane just insane. So shout out to his team for killing it. A girl could dream I wish Africa was open to everyone to travel in that way because it's such a beautiful continent. Countries are amazing the people are so welcoming as he saw and I saw a lot of TikToks also. While we were like oh my god everyone feels so welcoming so sweet I'm like yes yes because that's what human nature is and that's what humanity is and I think that's why black people just get colonized more. We're too nice we're too nice bro I'm telling you we're too nice because I'm thinking about the Africans and how just welcoming the arts of different cultures. Oh yes comment comment settle down comment take land for free and then before you know it's now you're the one that's working on the land that you give someone. Hey guys the last thing I want to say is if you're a continental African if you're Nigerian American if you're black American if you're a Caribbean if you're Afro Latina the difference between all of us is the boat that got us to where we are. And we're just like that Spider-Man meme where we're all pointing at each other because at the end of the day we are all black and it's if I kind of oftentimes feels like this I look at it from. You know like when you are running a race and maybe you're trying to get something let's try that you're trying to get somewhere and you know something is stopping a group of you. So keep fighting within your group to get past that thing for the actual culprits is the thing the person that puts the thing there in the first place that's what this is like if we all are mice right and there's some study going on and we're all just fighting within this study and these mice are fighting each other we're going at it. But the scientist is observing the mice and just shaking their hand and watching and be like interesting that's what it feels like sometimes it feels like a simulation because when we point fingers at ourselves and we're cursing each other out and we're you know talking about how you know one where FBA blocks versus Nigerian American or I'm going to American oh I'm going to and I'm going to and oh I'm South Africa at the end of the day. The colonizers are watching and being like yes look at them go go on fights they're watching they're watching they're encouraging they're excited for it because when that in fighting is happening you're so busy fighting each other you don't realize you've already lost like you're not even fighting the actual battle. The battle has been lost the moments you started fighting each other we're literally just beefing we're beefing over crumbs. We're fighting over crumbs we're fighting over the little pieces that are left when there's so much more and the moment we realize that the moments things sort of like work out for us I mean we're all stuck together and it's really really complicated but in the day I know we have love for each other. And so this black history month I think I just want to sort of like shout out my I think black people let me do like some bad bunny shit real quick hold on. We're going to try it now you guys this is crazy but I'm going to try this also black ethnic groups shout out to the African Americans so descendants of enslaved Africans in the U.S. Afro Caribbean nations like Jamaica Haiti change and Tobago people of African descent Afro Latinas and Latinos in Latin America. Garifuna Central America so mixed African and indigenous ancestry there shout out to the black immigrants some sort of African nation also individuals born in African nation that immigrated into the United States black Hispanic people who identify as both black and Hispanic color people from South Africa. The distinct category themselves of mixed ethnic groups color people in South Africa a distinct as color people in South Africa a distinct category for people of mixed ethnic group or origin during an after apathy. Shout out to Europe people Nigeria been in Tobago Ibo South it in the Nigeria house on with the Nigerian DJ Zulu South Africa Fulani Fula of course was Africa and the Sahel. Akhan Ghana and I recosed Wula from Senegal Gambia Mauritania all the African countries Monday was Africa Congo Democratic Republic of Congo. I'm Hara Aromo Somali and so many more there's so many of us so so so so so many of us and sometimes it's complicated sometimes it's hard but at the end of the day one thing I know is we're not breaking up. We're not breaking up we're stuck together and it is the hundredth year celebrating Black History Month in America and I know for a lot of people were watching this year like oh in America it doesn't matter around the world but as we all know anything that happens in America has one of the biggest impacts across the world because that's just the way it is so shout out to all of us for staying out here for keeping safe and sane. Shout out to black Americans who built this country from the ground up and yeah guys that is the end of my two loud the podcast with Sophie aka the mother of freaking Audity. I think this went well I really I'm so if you guys were to hear from the beginning I really still I'm so let's see about that first podcast episode because I feel like I missed some things if this is not focused you guys are taking it as it is I don't care fight I don't care because I'm done. I'm done I'm done it's been hard man all these days but I feel like the link is focused so we should be fine if not I'm just going to upload audio and call it a freaking day but I love you guys so much thank you so much for watching. Thank you for commenting make sure you like comment subscribe share this with everybody if you want to listen to it if you enjoyed the episode if you have your own thoughts on it let me know I always like when I feel like I'm able to talk about some things like from an educational point of view but also from a fun point of view. So if you think this was a good mix of both let me know and I'll see you guys in my next episode again Wednesdays at 1230 don't forget to leave me a voice message on the podcast at my two loud pod calm on my two loud calm and I'll see you guys later kisses. Oh that was not sexy kiss Sophie.